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Topic 2: Prompt for all applicants
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
(500 words)
I am Chinese girl, who are currently studying in Canada’s 12th grade and hoping to study for Massmedia or Business in top university in US.
You can use the my following experience as the raw materials for this essay. In order for you familiarize my background, I provide you with my personal statement.
I also attach the University of California’s application essays requirements as following. You also can get more information by browsing the school website at http://www.universityofcalifornia.edu/admissions/
Thank you very much for your time and great help in my college application!
Ms. Song
Raw material for this essay:
There is another unforgettable thing for me. My parents sent me to school and picked me up from the school with the car since the childhood, and I did not understand the feeling of riding a bicycle to go to school. Later, I offered to ride a bike to go to school to challenge myself. My parents did not agree at first due to the fear of insecurity, but then they agreed with my request in every possible way. After riding a bike to school for many times, one day, I suddenly found that the bikeway was very narrow on many roads, and perhaps it was gradually narrowed to facilitate the parking and car driving, but this greatly endangered the security and equitable interests of people who rided a bike. Due to the bikeways being too narrow, I could feel the pass-by buses roaring over my ears for several times, and they almost touched me! Finally, I decided to call and send e-mails to Xi’an traffic tourism radio, hoping to draw their attention. The initial calls turned out to be quite tiny, but after many times of hard-working and article appeals, I caused a big response and drew the attention of government personnel. The Bureau of Education, Xi’an City Government specially praised me, and I became a school celebrity for a short while. However, I was not very happy, because my intention was just to contribute my effort to society quietly, and I paid little attention to fame and fortune, which was also one of my beliefs in the life.
Personal Statement
Now you received a letter from the mysterious Oriental, as an ancient capital for thirteen dynasties settled here—XiAn, China. After received the eastern tradition education then continue to study in Canada in North America fortunately, accept open education and interested in this fun teaching.
The moral of my name “Wanying” has a profound meaning. In the dictionary of China the name means: full of gentle, tactful, joy and happiness. But that does not hide me strong and unyielding character, parents and grandparents often taught me, to be a girl that with good integrity, self-reliance and self-improvement. Especially my mother of the wise, persistence and indomitable spirit has been a far-reaching affected me. In my schooling and growing up, she always with the great and selfless love on me that is the healthy growth fertile soil. In the most painful time she takes me out of the shadows. Like a baby learned how to walk for the first time, when there is stumbling and falling she always give me support and faith.
I am such a girl like this: a sense of humor, lively, cheerful, and bring happiness and laughter to everyone around me. I like to work with all kinds of person no matter age, class, and professional, I like exchanging and talking with them. Because of this I can objectively see and know how to study different areas of knowledge, and master the observation, analysis of the things from different aspects. My hobbies are very extensive, since childhood I have a strong feeling to the art and colors, and obsessed with painting. Also for the sake of get more good progress, the hard practice the piano a long time then became ill, but I think it is worth, nine level certificates is my great achievements. Business before pleasure fruit more lasting appeal. I always believe god always returns good care and diligence, no pains no gains. I am profound of China’s cultural, and also enchanted for western open education. Western open learning mode offered me a good platform, I learn photography, art studio creation, music creation and so on, and this for my art life added color. Although I was only 16 years old and to the other side of the earth alone-Canada, but I cry only once. Even if the hardness and full of challenge, but the spirit of persist can take the kind of achievement and it is irreplaceable. That is such a challenge one and anther so fun and full of my life, let me no longer lonely. The way ahead is full of thorns, and realizes the ideal need is not only the courage, but also need ability and wisdom, good interpersonal communication and the perfect combination of communication can only hope to achieve.
President Reagan’s words made me excited: Not president be advertising man. I am eager to the major of education industry and the media. More eager to make and start my own air media platforms in the future, creating a distinctive columns of social service, the first time to keep fresh rapid transfer information and cultural information section … Professional ideal is to run a school which can really realize students’ quality education, students can play a role with their own special skill, and the development of their potential, training talents, why not is this a way of contribution for society and the world? To own media organizations, do a packaging program, packing talents, to be the senior media people.
My ideal is to be a senior educators, media scholars and skilled manager, I like challenging career, its particularity and the height of the social sense of responsibility and mission, make me admire, political, economic, cultural, business, law, the people’s livelihood and even entertainment, food and so on various areas, all walks of life is inseparable from the media, it’s spread function and the vast amount of information are full of passion and need to prepare for the talents of agile person can do it. I meant I like to rise to the challenge. China has a word: everything is sorted only owe the east wind! I’m ready!
University of California undergraduate application essays direction
Your personal statement should be exactly that — personal. This is your opportunity to tell us about yourself — your hopes, ambitions, life experiences, inspirations. We encourage you to take your time on this assignment. Be open. Be reflective. Find your individual voice and express it honestly.
As you respond to the essay prompts, think about the admissions and scholarship officers who will read your statement and what you want them to understand about you. While your personal statement is only one of many factors we consider when making our admission decision, it helps provide context for the rest of your application.
All applicants must respond to two essay prompts — the general prompt and either the freshman or transfer prompt, depending on your status.
Responses to your two prompts must be a maximum of 1,000 words total.
Allocate the word count as you wish. If you choose to respond to one prompt at greater length, we suggest your shorter answer be no less than 250 words.
The essay prompts
Topic 1: xxxx
Topic 2: Prompt for all applicants
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
Tips and techniques
Start early.
Allow time for reflection, thoughtful preparation and revision.
Choose a topic for both essays.
Look critically at the information in your application: your grades, awards, activities and work experience, family and income. Anticipate questions an admissions evaluator will have after reading your application. The personal statement is your opportunity to answer those questions.
Compose your personal statement in a word-processing program.
Don’t type it directly into the application. This way, you will have the opportunity to print copies for review.
Write persuasively.
Present your information and ideas in a focused, deliberate and meaningful manner. Provide specific, concrete examples to support your point. A personal statement that is simply a list of qualities or accomplishments usually is not persuasive.
In addition to checking your spelling, be sure your grammar is correct and your essays flow smoothly.
Solicit feedback.
Your personal statement should reflect your own ideas and be written by you alone, but others — family, teachers and friends — can offer valuable suggestions. Ask advice of whomever you like, but do not plagiarize from sources in print or online and do not use anyone’s published words but your own.
This is one of many pieces of information we consider in reviewing your application. An admission decision will not be based on your personal statement alone.
Tips on the personal statement
Hear what UC students have to say about writing the essays. more

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