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Conflict Styles

Conflict Styles
Order Description
Style: APA for your citations (see workbook for APA hints). The paper should be typed and double-spaced, 12 inch standard font, with one inch margins (no larger or smaller). You should be able to accomplish the objective of the paper in 5-6 pages (no longer!). The text of the paper should be 5-6 pages. That does not include the title page or the reference page.
Objective: The purpose of this paper is to understand what you bring to conflict situations. Write a paper describing your conflict style in personal and public settings. Use as data what others say about your style and what you think about your style. Base your readings on the conflict chapter, the conflict tactics handout, any useful information from the lecture notes and break out discussions.
Self Score    Person 1
“Ouida“    Person 2
“Tanner“    Average across all 3 people
Competitive    7    5    6    6
Collaborating    5    3    7    5
Compromising    6    9    6    7
Avoidant    5    10    8    7.66
Accommodating    6    3    3    4
1.    B is for instances when I care more about the issue at hand and want to find common ground where A is when I am uninterested in the outcome. My best friend views this choice through the eyes of someone I’m commonly trying to agree with while most commonly I am unconcerned with the resolution.
2.    I do not understand the differences in these responses. Maybe my “compromise” involves dealing with all of each participants concern.
3.    Tanner’s response proves that while handling conflict with friends I’m more concerned with my own personal goals and achieving them rather than concerning myself with the relationship.
4.    I would rather bargain with family since I know the relationships can’t sever, while I am more cautious with friends whose relationships I cherish.
6.    The interviewer agrees with “A” my mother’s choice.
8.    The interviewer agrees with Tanner and Ouida. I personally feel that I’m conscious of others’ feelings which often tends to lead me to abandon my goals to in order to compromise everyones feelings.
9.    Both are true, most points are not both worrying about, but I do try to get my way.
12. Situational depending, both are true.
13. The interviewer & I agree that I press to get points made.
14. Both are right again
15. A & B are the same to me
16. Depending on who I’m arguing with I usually tend to avoid tension mostly but always strive to make my point.
17.
Summary: My mother and best friend think that I would rather avoid tension and conflict. I, on the other hand, consider myself competitive in the matter. This could be for a number of different reasons. One reason I believe I compete and others think I avoid may be due to the difference in what I’m thinking versus how I actually react.
Conflict Styles
Style:  APA  for your citations (see workbook for APA hints). The paper should be typed and double-spaced, 12 inch standard font, with one inch margins (no larger or smaller).  You should be able to accomplish the objective of the paper in 5-6 pages (no longer!). The text of the paper should be 5-6 pages.  That does not include the title page or the reference page.
Objective:  The purpose of this paper is to understand what you bring to conflict situations.  Write a paper describing your conflict style in personal and public settings.  Use as data what others say about your style and what you think about your style.  Base your readings on the conflict chapter, the conflict tactics handout, any useful information from the lecture notes and break out discussions.
Steps:
A.  You must give the conflict behavior scale to at least 2 other people in addition to filing it out for yourself (you might elect to give it to 3 other people if you find it helpful.  In that case, modify the table below to accommodate all 4 of you).
Version 1 you fill out.  It is THOMAS-KILMANN CONFLICT MODE in your course workbook.
Version 2:  Is on ELC.  Make 2 copies, have 2 different people fill it out while thinking about your conflict style. Try to ask 2 different people who are in different types of relationships with you (e.g., parent, friend, work, sibling).  These people all MUST have a personal relationship with you.  If you are unclear about what makes a relationship personal, check chapter 1 of your text. The scale they complete is the same one you did, except they are asked to think about your behavior rather than their own.
B.  After you have had others complete the conflict behavior scale about you, compare those scores to your own on this chart.  See where there are inconsistencies between your own perceptions and perceptions of others.
You must insert the following chart somewhere in your paper.  In the table, enter your score for each person for each conflict style.  Indicate your relationship with that person.
Self Score    Person 1
“Ouida“    Person 2
“Tanner“    Average across all 3 people
Competitive    7    5    6    6
Collaborating    5    3    7    5
Compromising    6    9    6    7
Avoidant    5    10    8    7.66
Accommodating    6    3    3    4
C.   Interview one person who knows you well and ask them to help you sort through some of these inconsistencies.  Note:  You cannot argue with this person, denigrate them or tell them they are wrong.  You are asking them to help you and thus, you should listen carefully to what they have to say and thank them for their help.  Refer to the interview in your paper where appropriate.
D.  You must turn in your contact information (who filled it out, relationship to you and phone number/email).  I also need the name and contact information for the person you interviewed
NOTE:  You should explain your data and the data of the two other people.  Explain does not mean telling me how other people are wrong.
In the paper, somewhere you must answer the following issues (tip:  Don’t simply follow them in order, craft a good paper):
1.    Choose your primary style.  Some of you will clearly have one style that dominates (e.g., you are a competitive person).  Others will have perhaps 2 dominant styles (e.g., you are usually avoidant but if you have to fight, you become very competitive.  Or perhaps you are collaborative with friends and work mates but competitive with family and romantic partners).  Thus some of you will write about one style while others may have to write about 2 styles.  If you have to write about more than one style, it is critical that you explain when/where/how you employ your different styles.
2.     Describe the tactics you use most often.  To do so, look at your data and compare them to the handout on conflict tactics.  After indicating your most often used tactics, tell me a story of a time you have used these tactics.  How did these tactic choices affect the conflict and its resolution?   Note, again, if you use more than one style, you’ll need to describe the tactics you use for each style.
3.    By “story” remember I mean evidence.
Claims tell us something, evidences shows us something.  A claim is “I am avoidant” or “I refuse to argue with people.”  Evidence would show me how you refuse to argue with people, what you say and do and how the other person responds.  Make sure when you provide evidence your stories/examples clearly show how you communicate and how others react to it.
4.    In your experience, what have been the advantages of your conflict style?  What are its disadvantages?  These are answers about you so they should reflect your life and not parrot back the course reading or lecture.
5.     How flexible are you in your conflict style?  What is your evidence?
6.    If you could choose one thing to change about your style, what would it be?  What conflict style would you aspire to be more like?  What tactics from this would you like to use more often and why?
7.    Where did you learn your style?  Who had the most influence on you and why?
Organization and Style
1.    Organize your paper by including an introduction, body and conclusion.   The last sentence in your introductory paragraph should be your thesis statement.  For tips on writing a thesis statement, consult this Web site: http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/composition/thesis.htm
2.    Paragraphs are at least five sentences long.
3.    The conclusion of your paper should wrap up and review, in general, what was stated in the paper.  This paragraph should be at least 5 sentences long.  The last sentence should leave the reader with a memorable thought about your interpersonal communication competence.  Be creative.  Answer the question that guided this paper.
4.    Use the information that we have discussed in class as well as your textbook to support what you say in the paper.  Cite the textbook when you use it.  Cite it properly (see workbook for APA examples).  Go on line to see mock up pages done in APA style.  Follow those.
5.    Title Page please.  Be creative!  On the title page should be
a. My name
b. The time your class meets
c. Your name, a clever title for the paper.
d. A running head (again, see the work book for help with APA Style)
6.  Each page of the paper should have a page # and a running head on it.
7.    The last thing that you should do is to read and edit your paper, run spelling and grammar checks, and read and edit the paper again.
8.    Your paper will be graded on content, organization, and writing.  If you fail to proofread or to run spelling and grammar checks, your paper grade will be reduced by 10%.
9.  Due date:  12/2 to me during class time. Papers are due during class time on the due date.  Any paper turned in after class time on the due date is automatically marked off 10%.  You drop another 10% for each day it is late after that. See the syllabus for a reminder of this policy. If you turn it in to the main communication studies office, ask the receptionist to date stamp your paper.
10.  Your paper must be stapled; we won’t accept papers that are not stapled.
.
COMM1500        Paper II        Grading Rubric
A)    APA/Spelling/Grammar/followed directions/references        /30
Turned in Contact information
B)     How well written is Intro/Concluding paragraphs            /20
(Good thesis statement, good/well written conclusion)
C)     Strength of Conflict Style Argument/Use of Evidence            /80
(Tactics, use of table, use of interview, stories)
D)    How well you covered major questions                /40
Flexibility, where they learned style,
Try something new
E)    Depth/ Organization/Smooth Writing                    /30
/200
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